Physical Grafitti
Aug. 25th, 2008 05:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
penfield"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."
- Mark Twain
Hypothetical: If it were possible, would you take it upon yourself to take upon yourself every disease, ailment, illness or sniffle in the place of your beloved family members, if it meant that they would be 100 percent healthy for the rest of their lives? Assume that the agreement would be in effect until you die, but that the cumulative effect of these illnesses would not kill you anytime soon. You would simply be miserable and probably at least a little disgusting for the rest of your life, while your loved ones can have suntans and ice cream cones all summer long.
Two very common platitudes are "At least you have your health" and "family comes first." But what if those two notions were at cross-purposes? Which would you choose?
Health is on my mind at the moment because I have my annual physical tomorrow. It is supposed to be my annual physical, anyway; it is actually my first annual physical in three years, which I suppose makes it my triennial physical. Please, God, let there not be any fireworks.
This visit is also ostensibly a follow-up to a medical visit nearly two months ago regarding my elevated blood pressure. You may recall that at that time I was instructed to monitor my blood pressure regularly with my own blood pressure cuff, maintain a reduced-salt diet, undertake a consistent aerobic exercise regimen and lose ten pounds or so. I am pleased to report that I have been very good about the first thing, pretty good about the second thing, and generally very close to good about the third thing. We're just going to pretend like I forgot about the fourth thing.
As part of the physical I will need to have blood drawn for a battery of tests. This of course necessitates fasting for at least 12 hours prior to my morning appointment, so there will be no supper for me tonight. It makes me feel a bit like I am cramming for a test. In this same vein, I admit to some self-conscious and irregular dietary choices over the past 72 hours; the grilled tuna and spinach salad I made for dinner last night is not a part of my usual repertoire, although I have to admit that I came out quite nicely, even without a generous dusting of cheese.
Maybe these phony last-minute lifestyle changes are pointless, even counter-productive. Perhaps a week of living healthily is surely a drop in the bucket relative to my otherwise hedonistic lifestyle. I certainly don't like the idea being disingenuous with my doctor -- he's a really nice guy and I don't want to disappoint him -- but not as much as I loathe the idea of giving up cookies n' cream.
It feels wrong just being the least bit facetious about my health at all. Throughout my life, at least I've had my health. If I don't have my health, what do I at least have? Job security? Material posessions? The love of a good woman? Please don't make me choose.
- Mark Twain
Hypothetical: If it were possible, would you take it upon yourself to take upon yourself every disease, ailment, illness or sniffle in the place of your beloved family members, if it meant that they would be 100 percent healthy for the rest of their lives? Assume that the agreement would be in effect until you die, but that the cumulative effect of these illnesses would not kill you anytime soon. You would simply be miserable and probably at least a little disgusting for the rest of your life, while your loved ones can have suntans and ice cream cones all summer long.
Two very common platitudes are "At least you have your health" and "family comes first." But what if those two notions were at cross-purposes? Which would you choose?
Health is on my mind at the moment because I have my annual physical tomorrow. It is supposed to be my annual physical, anyway; it is actually my first annual physical in three years, which I suppose makes it my triennial physical. Please, God, let there not be any fireworks.
This visit is also ostensibly a follow-up to a medical visit nearly two months ago regarding my elevated blood pressure. You may recall that at that time I was instructed to monitor my blood pressure regularly with my own blood pressure cuff, maintain a reduced-salt diet, undertake a consistent aerobic exercise regimen and lose ten pounds or so. I am pleased to report that I have been very good about the first thing, pretty good about the second thing, and generally very close to good about the third thing. We're just going to pretend like I forgot about the fourth thing.
As part of the physical I will need to have blood drawn for a battery of tests. This of course necessitates fasting for at least 12 hours prior to my morning appointment, so there will be no supper for me tonight. It makes me feel a bit like I am cramming for a test. In this same vein, I admit to some self-conscious and irregular dietary choices over the past 72 hours; the grilled tuna and spinach salad I made for dinner last night is not a part of my usual repertoire, although I have to admit that I came out quite nicely, even without a generous dusting of cheese.
Maybe these phony last-minute lifestyle changes are pointless, even counter-productive. Perhaps a week of living healthily is surely a drop in the bucket relative to my otherwise hedonistic lifestyle. I certainly don't like the idea being disingenuous with my doctor -- he's a really nice guy and I don't want to disappoint him -- but not as much as I loathe the idea of giving up cookies n' cream.
It feels wrong just being the least bit facetious about my health at all. Throughout my life, at least I've had my health. If I don't have my health, what do I at least have? Job security? Material posessions? The love of a good woman? Please don't make me choose.
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no subject
Date: 2008-08-26 04:46 am (UTC)In the past, I would have said yes. But after 18 months of therapy and 6 months of a support group, I say, emphatically, no - I would not give up any piece of my health for a family member (this is not counting organ transplants - I refer strictly to the fantasy trading of afflictions).
Because I've learned through experience that no matter how much of yourself you give up for a family member, you are only worse for it, and they are no better for it. It isn't a win-win, or even a win-lose situation; it is lose-lose. What is theirs is theirs, for better or for worse. And what is mine, is mine. Not to acknowledge that is to open the door to codependency.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-26 03:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-27 04:51 pm (UTC)MOM(my)