penfield | card-bored

On November 25, 2004, I wrote this:

This year so far -- including IOUs and promises -- I've tallied 11 phone calls, eight cards, seven e-mails, seven gifts and three meals. This represents slight growth from 2003, when I received 10 phone calls, seven cards, five e-mails, four gifts and two meals.

The 2005 score:

Three phone calls, one card, four e-mails, five gifts and two meals. To be fair, at least four people combined on one of those gifts, so it's really more like eight gifts, and I'm not counting one of those meals as a gift even though that's pretty much what it was, so it's really actually like nine gifts and one meal, this doesn't include the free Flat Top Grill stir-fry, although that is really more of a promotional coupon than a gift, much like the 20-percent-off DSW certificate I received in the mail, neither of which I have yet had the opportunity to redeem, so I don't think it counts as a gift. If a gift certificate is not redeemed, does it make a sound?

Overall, it was a somewhat disappointing end to an outstanding year, probably my best all-around year since 1998. Thanks to those of you who contributed in 2005. Your efforts will not be forgotten. Should this trend hold true, here's hoping for an equally shitty birthday card turnout for 2006.

Excelsior!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Maybe if you actually TOLD people your birthday was coming up...

Well, it IS right there under my user info -- Birthdate: 1976-11-22. But that's not really the point; if they remembered my birthday in 2003 and 2004, they shouldn't need me to remind them this year.

Besides, publicizing one's own birthday smacks of egotism and insecurity. In previous years, I have kept absolutely silent about my birthday and been accused of being anti-social.

This year I organized my own birthday dinner and was accused of taking too much of a hands-on role in organizing the celebration. I suspect, however, that if I had not, nothing would have been organized at all.

I continue to hold out hope that someday someone will throw me a surprise party, but if that ever happens I will either be relieved instead of surprised or irritated that it took everyone so long to get their collective act together. I'm difficult to please.

Which, I suppose, is the theme of this post.

I've seen your tallies from previous years about your birthday, and have been at somewhat of a loss. It seems to me that holding everyone around your accountable for remembering your birthday (and losing brownie points if they forget) is a somewhat bizare habit. I understand wanting a day all to yourself when other people acknowledge the anniversary of the beginning of your existence on the planet, thus giving you some sort of vindication that you are a good person, and gosh darn it, people like you. But on the other hand, it seems to me to be a petty standard to hold people to, and one that would only bring you disapointment. Wouldn't it be more accurate to keep track of little things all year? Although I suppose then that might really contribute to a Scrooge-like way of looking at things.

I'm not sure that I really have a good answer for this dilemna in my head, but thanks for letting me post it here.

signed,
the girl whose parents STILL forget their first-born's birthday (my in-laws remember it better than my own family!!)

Let the record show that I've never accused you of being "anti-social," even in the year when you specifically excluded me from your birthday plans. Interestingly, I lobbed you a birthday phone call that year but didn't this year.

Meanwhile, when is your Flat-Top dinner celebration? And can I come? Pretty please?

I'll remember Omonigho's name this time.

I'm going to Flat Top tomorrow night, and I was going to invite you, but I recall that you will be en parentis loco. Your social calendar would be a lot easier to navigate if you resented your parents like a normal person.

Well I apologize for not knowing your birthday and not realizing I could look it up here. My mother used to know these things and used to remind me but I'm terrible at actually going out and getting a card or even finding out what your mailing address is. I think the whole birthday celebration thing just goes out the window anyway when your older. My birthday falls during school concert season and on my in-laws anniversary and near my mother-in-laws birthday so I have come to terms that there will just not ever be enough time to really celebrate my birthday any more than going out to dinner which I enjoy doing anyway. Don't feel too bad, your not the only one. My brother's birthday doesn't get celebrated that well either because it is right inbetween thanksgiving and christmas and we either have to celebrate early or late or not at all because it is a busy time of year and it is hard to get out and visit him. Ok, now that I've gone on and on, I hope you at least enjoyed whatever birthday you did have! and again, I'm sorry I missed it! :)

I think people are taking this a little too seriously; I did not mean this as a full-scale indictment of my friends and family. I just noticed a significant drop-off from the last few years and wanted to point it out. I had a lovely birthday in any case and nobody owes me any apologies. Belated gifts will still be accepted, though.

card-bored

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Hmmm

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yup

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